Phenomenal Mama: 2011

I debated whether or not I should even mention this but because I obviously have a problem. . .right after I typed the title of this post I immediately thought of the N.W.A video. . .ahem.

It was not my intention to evoke images of Compton's Most Wanted and all of their jheri curl splendor. . .instead this post is supposed to be about creative expression, which I'm sure N.W.A. would argue that it's exactly what their song is about.

I am facing extreme burnout with "corporate America". Seriously, I am so ova all of the policies, procedures and politics. I really want to find a way to pursue my passions without having to give up something critical like shelter or my iPhone.

I have been a closet writer for roughly 28 years. I should have published about 10 books and had something optioned as a movie by now! But I've mostly kept my writing to myself as an outlet for the myriad of thoughts and ideas running rampant in my head!

Okay confession: I haven't exactly kept them all to myself- I may or may not have published quiet a few stories on a fanfiction site that shall remain nameless. It's actually my guilty pleasure. It's not that I'm ashamed of the writing, it's actually pretty good, if I must say so myself it's just that well- I'm more embarrassed than ashamed because I've written some pretty *cough* raunchy stuff. So, I use a pseudonym and maintain an anonymous relationship with my readers and reviewers. That way I don't have to lower my head and avoid making eye contact with people I actually know.

BUT I have been working on some actual stories- as in plural- which is part of my problem. It's like I have ADHD and once I get started on one story another idea pops in my head and I'm off to start another story. . .what was I talking about? Oh yeah, I'm working on actual stories and am committing myself to actually completing one within the next year that I can present to an agent and hopefully get some representation that will allow me to start querying publishers.

In all honesty, I would LOVE to see one of my stories made into a movie. I usually approach my writing that way, visualizing each paragraph or chapter as it would appear frame by frame in a movie. In addition to writing I also have this concept for producing educational materials (books and videos specifically) that feature children of color. I already have a name and even a logo/mascot that I own. Ain't he cute :-)

I've also been doing some blog banners, Photoshop editing and playing around with Dreamweaver. My mind is in total creative mode right now and it just sucks that I don't have enough time to really dedicate to the stuff that I really love doing (other than being a mommy ;-). But I'm making moves. . . I've got some schemes and plans that will hopefully have me unchained before the end of 2011. Because I honestly feel like I'm drowning and I really want to break free from this abyss so that I can soar among the clouds like God intended. Well, I'm sure he didn't literally mean for us to fly- that's why he created birds- but I mean he didn't put us here to be ordinary either.

I bid you adieu with this little gem (now I couldn't exactly play the N.W.A. version, this is a family oriented blog ;-)

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Princess Power

I survived the weekend (mostly) and made it through to another Tuesday. There seems to be a theme developing here with posting on Tuesdays. Maybe that's a good thing, at least there will be some level of consistency in my life.

ThePrincess turned TWO on Sunday and the diva persona was definitely kicked up several notches. As soon as she woke up on Sunday, her brother told her it was her birthday and she immediately commanded that we all sing "happy birthday" (so we did) and then she wanted to eat cake and blow out candles. . .I had to draw the line somewhere, I mean it was only 9:00am. If it had been 10:00am. . .maybe. . .

She was in a demanding, loud and obnoxious mood for most of the morning- not so different from other mornings except she kept adding "it's my birthday" to the end of every command when we didn't respond quickly enough. Her brother, ThePushover (formerly known as TheGenius) agreed that she should get whatever she wanted because in case we didn't hear her the first 500 times- IT'S HER BIRTHDAY!

Geez, I swear I don't know where she's headed with this. . .okay, I kinda do- I mean I petitioned for my birthday to be a national holiday until I was 30 then I just wanted the presents but not the acknowledgement that I had grown another year older as a single, childless woman (ah, the good old days).

I'm kidding (sort of), I think ThePrincess is fabulous and by all means on her special day she should have total and complete attention and compliance. Otherwise she might turn us all into frogs!

Friday, April 1, 2011

TGIF!!

I'm so glad it's Friday but my weekend is going to be super busy! Studying plus ThePrincess turns two on SUNDAY! Where did the time go? This morning I stopped by TheGenius' school for an award ceremony he had four 100's and one 99 on his report card and he ranked above 99% (isn't that 100?!) on the IOWA tests! I am just sooo proud of him. I truly hope his genuine interest in school and learning continues FOREVER!! He was so cute pretending like it wasn't a big deal I was there but blushing like crazy and pointing me out to all his friends! I <3 him, hard! Well, I'm sure there will be plenty of hijinks and antics this weekend, so I should have a full report next week! Stay light and breezy! :-)

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

M.O.M

You know that saying "she's been here before"? Well, I think that totally applies to my daughter. I think my great-grandmother has come back to haunt me.

There is no way this kid is about to be two years old. She's more like 72 or 82. Her entire demeanor reeks of overconfidence. It's like she doesn't need to watch where she's going because she's been there before. . .

I've been watching her a lot lately and her mannerisms are so decidedly feminine but they are somewhat bold and graceless, a lot like Tyler Perry's, Madea. From wanting to take her purse (in the crook of her arm) AND her baby to daycare everyday to wearing mu-mu's and hats. All the signs are there!

By the way, the post title refers to her first, middle and last name initials. Coincidence? I think not.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Work Life Balance

Okay, so I've had several hours to take some deep calming breaths since that last post and get past the idiot who sent me not one but two RANDOM comments about something posted on my blog two years ago.

That is the risk of having a blog and putting yourself out there to share your experiences, every now and then you have to deal with the crazies.

Moving on. . . .

I have been "working from home" every Tuesday for the past month and I have to say it has been WONDERFUL. The only thing that would make it even better is if I worked from home EVERYDAY. I know there are a lot of challenges with working from home namely the lack of face time, which can hurt your career and the feeling of isolation from your team.

But in my opinion the pros definitely outweigh the cons, especially for mothers working outside of the home. Shall I list my personal faves:

1. No commute

2. Saving on gas

3. No commute

4. Literally rolling right out of bed to log on

5. No commute

6. Throwing a load of laundry in the wash while waiting on an email

7. Putting a roast or chicken or whatever in the over while on a conference call

8. Grocery shopping on your lunch hour

9. Picking your children up from daycare/school early instead of ten minutes before the daycare closes(!)

10. Did I say NO COMMUTE?

Not having to get on the freeway and fight my way through traffic is the biggest plus for me because when I work from home not only am I always on time but I don't spend thirty minutes talking about the idiot who cut me off in traffic on my way to the office. No stress. Very peaceful way to start the day. I honestly find that I am way more productive when I work from home also because the proverbial water cooler is missing.

I think most people who work a typical 8 to 5 office job spend quite a bit of time socializing instead of actually working, i.e. congregating at a co-worker's desk gossiping, in meetings that last way past the scheduled time or taking group lunches that last more than an hour. Or is this just me and the people where I work??

But when you eliminate those distractions, it's a lot easier to be productive. You've got to make sure you're disciplined enough to work from home or it can be a disaster. I have three main rules I follow:

No t.v.
No kids
Set up computer in a separate workspace- not my bedroom!

This has been a wonderful accommodation by my employer and because it is going so well, I may get to add another day.

I feel so much more refreshed and calm when my kids get home on Tuesday evenings because dinner is already done and I'm not all wound up from sitting in traffic and feeling rushed to get a meal on the table. I have more time to focus more on them and we can spend quality time together as a family.

Madness

Why would people log on to blogs of people they don't know and leave idiotic comments on posts that were created TWO YEARS AGO?

Oh, I know because it is a very underhanded way of trying to drive traffic to your own site. Haven't you ever heard the saying, "you catch more flies with honey?"

My comments are moderated. . .I'm a busy woman and if you don't have anything constructive to say then keep your comments to yourself and stay off my blog. I'm not interested in you or your products.

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Black Marriage Day

Today is Black Marriage Day. Really. It says so right here.

I'm just a little confused because I'm black and I've been married almost 9 years and we celebrate and collaborate EVERY DAY. It's not always easy but we are committed to each other and our family and we make it work. But I guess it doesn't hurt to have a reminder about what marriage means and why it's important to strengthen that bond. So, in honor of Black Marriage Day, this post is dedicated to my marriage and in the spirit of Tyler Perry's Why Did I Get Married I give to you my reasons:

I got married because. . . .

I love him immensely
He makes me laugh often
He adores me
He desires me
He makes me feel like I can fly
I knew he'd be an amazing father (and he is!)
He supports me
He challenges me
He respects me
He is very smart
He holds his ground
He is a gentleman
He can fix just about anything
He loves to travel (like me!)
He is passionate

Although his Aquarian idealism often clashes with my pragmatic Taurus nature, we still respect each other's space and opinions. Sometimes our political views differ but we are totally in sync when it comes to parenting. We both want to ensure our children get all of the love, attention, discipline, and encouragement they need to become well adjusted, emotionally stable adults.

And I hope that one day they will be able to find a partner who sends them into a fit of giggles with one look or who shares their dreams without restrictions and loves them they way they deserve to be loved. And I hope that they reciprocate 100% because that's what marriage is all about.

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Catching Up

My last full post was at the end of 2009. 2009! I haven't blogged in over a year! Wow. I thought long and hard about why it has been so long and wondered if I had run out of things to talk about or if I had so much stuff to say that there would be no way in hell I could fit everything in. I'd like to the think it was a combination of both.

The truth is that life with two kids, working full time outside of the home and taking classes is EXHAUSTING and the last thing I want to do (I think able is a better word) is log on and share my day or my experience with the blogosphere.

But lately I find myself needing that outlet again as I'm contemplating the next chapter in my life. I turned 40 last year (gasp) and my priorities have been shifting big time.

The title on that magazine cover is hilarious "WARNING: KIDS". Ha! Yeah, they should totally come with a warning label. I think the hardest thing for me has been trying to further divide myself and give enough time, love and attention to yet another person! But even harder is the subsequent guilt I feel when I don't think I've succeeded at giving everyone what they need.

I can hardly believe how fast the past two years have flown by. My baby girl is turning two in 7 days! That seems so unreal to me. I've been here with her every day and present in her life but in many ways I feel like I've missed so much. It's strange because it was the exact opposite with my son- seems like he was a "baby" much longer and I can remember specific milestones with him. I'm ashamed to say, I can't tell you exactly when my daughter started walking. It's like we looked up one day and she was on her feet!

I'm trying to slow down and focus more on her (and my son) but that often means sacrificing any time for myself and that's definitely not a good thing. In order to be a fully functioning parent you need to take time for yourself to refresh and renew. WOO-SA!!

(Sidebar- of course WOO-SA came from Bad Boys 2, did y'all hear there was going to be a part 3? I LOVE Bad Boys but seriously? Will and Martin are getting older and can't be running around like they used to. . .but I guess that didn't stop Mel Gibson and Danny Glover with the Lethal Weapon movies. .. but I digress)

Last year we took some family trips to see how well baby girl would travel because TheGenius is a travel pro! His first trip was to Jamaica when he was like 20 months old and he did not cry or fuss AT ALL during that entire trip!

Baby girl wanted to stand up in the seats and jump around on the flight to Philly. She did okay on the flight to Minneapolis, she was just a little loud. Okay, she was really loud! She wants her way constantly and that is going to be a lifelong struggle between the two of us. She's an Aries and I'm a Taurus so we're always locking horns!

We haven't traveled since the end of last year (a quick road trip to Dallas) and I have the cabin fever! I want to go somewhere!!! So, we're looking at Easter weekend maybe going to Florida or California- I need a beach!

Sorry if my thoughts are all over the place, it was a lot harder jumping back into this than I initially thought. My intention was to talk about what I've learned and what we've done over the past year and a half but I guess that will be the next post ;-) In the meantime, here is a video that highlights our 2010 escapades! Enjoy!

Friday, March 25, 2011

I'm Baaack!

Kinda. I want to start blogging again. I'm on Facebook and Twitter but there just seems to be something missing. Not sure if it's the character limitations or all of the people posting conflicting statuses that's got me a little down. I guess what it really boils down to is I just miss rambling and talking about being a mommy.

So, I'm back. It'll be light initially but I plan on diving back in full time within the coming weeks. I'm sure I'll have to re-establish myself (i.e., find people who will log on and read my ramblings) but I look forward to it. I'm also looking forward to re-establishing some great connections and meeting some new bloggers.

Please standby. . . .

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Sunday, April 10, 2011

Moved

Trying something a little different to contain all of my creative aspirations. . . this is will be my last post on blogger. Please visit my new blog here. My main site is twmomie.com. I hope to see you at my new place ;-)

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Blogger Is Evil

Okay, I have to rant a minute and post this random entry because I am totally paranoid that someone read my last post before it was edited and they are laughing and pointing at the screen saying, "SHE THINKS SHE CAN BE A WRITER?"

The unedited post was full of stupid typos and I was trying to fix a problem with the DIV tags when the post was automatically PUBLISHED! Yikes. If anyone read that unedited rubbish, I am truly sorry for abusing the English language. It has been fixed.

That is all.

(And now my template is screwed up. . .is the sidebar is gone? Is it just ME? WTH?!)

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