God forgive me for over sleeping and being at the computer instead of church.
Amen.
Kim Wayans used play a character on In Living Color named Ms. Bonita, the neighborhood gossip monger. She talked about everybody but when people started talking about her favorite person, Ms. Jenkins. She would get upset and start proclaiming, "Nobody bet not say nothing bad about Ms. Jenkins!" as if Ms. Jenkins was beyond reproach.
I use that point of reference as I start into a story from yesterday. First of all contrary to the way it may appear on this blog I do not proclaim to believe that my son is perfect. Not by any stretch of the imagination. He is four and he behaves like a four year old. He is past the age of throwing tantrums but he still does things that he has no business doing -like pushing a chair in front of the sink turning on the water and transferring water and a BUNCH of dish washing liquid from cup to cup and then perching them on the edge of the counter where they inevitably fall to the floor creating a pool in the kitchen, when asked why he did it he shrugged his shoulders and said, "I was making lemonade,".
He tunes my husband and I completely out when he's watching t.v. and often times I have to do the whole "don't let me count to three" thing to get him moving a little faster. But there are some non-negotiables like I've mentioned before- you do not talk back or yell at your mother that is daddy's number one rule and failure to comply has ended up in spankings (probably 3 in four years) and punishment (no television all day, no toys and remanded to his room). So, again I recognize that I am dealing with a typical kid.
But make no mistake about it when we are out in public my son knows how to act. I'm sorry if there are doubters out there who don't believe it but it's true. Besides that is where I draw the line- I am not going to be embarrassed by a four year old who appears to have me on a string like a puppet- that's where my "old school" mentality comes out and trust me he knows when mama is serious. When I am away from him he knows that the adults that I have entrusted to take care of him are in charge. They have my unspoken permission to discipline him if he gets out of line.
Having said all this- whew- yesterday I was totally pissed off when an elder in my family "chastised" him without provocation. There was a birthday party/baby shower for a cousin and kids were in attendance although they were all in another room playing together. However my son, the mama's boy, was underfoot the entire time. He was not running, yelling, crying, disruptive, or anything else. He was just being my shadow. At one point I was taking a picture and I had the camera on a strap around my neck and when I let go of the camera it hit him in the head. He grabbed his head and said, "ow'. I picked him up and kissed the spot and said, "I'm sorry, I didn't see you," From ACROSS the room comes this comment: "That's because he needs to sit his ass down somewhere," And suddenly the room was quiet. My cousin knew I was about to spew some disrespectful vulgarities, so she immediately starting opening another present and oohing and aahing.
I on the other hand forced my child (who was convinced he had did something wrong) to sit as still as a statue until my cousin opened her last present and I bounced. I know that to some perhaps his presence was irritating being that he was the only child physically in the room the entire time but that comment was still- in my opinion- unwarranted. Or maybe, I'm acting like Ms. Bonita and not wanting anyone to say a word against my son?
I have to add before I sign off that had this been any other party/shower that was aimed at only adults or women there is NO WAY my son would have been there. I am not that mama who drags their children to every event invited or not. First of all, I was told it was okay if he came since my husband had to work, secondly it was a "CPT" affair that was set to start at 4:00pm and didn't officially get started until almost 6:00pm not to mention it was hotter than hades in the house. The entire affair was busted from the jump so to make it appear my son was disturbing the mood was just unfair.
This is Bonita Jenkins signing off. . .
ALL COMMENTS ON THIS SITE ARE MODERATED. INTELLIGENT DIALOGUE WELCOMED.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Sunday, May 4, 2008
Blowing off Steam
God forgive me for over sleeping and being at the computer instead of church.
Amen.
Kim Wayans used play a character on In Living Color named Ms. Bonita, the neighborhood gossip monger. She talked about everybody but when people started talking about her favorite person, Ms. Jenkins. She would get upset and start proclaiming, "Nobody bet not say nothing bad about Ms. Jenkins!" as if Ms. Jenkins was beyond reproach.
I use that point of reference as I start into a story from yesterday. First of all contrary to the way it may appear on this blog I do not proclaim to believe that my son is perfect. Not by any stretch of the imagination. He is four and he behaves like a four year old. He is past the age of throwing tantrums but he still does things that he has no business doing -like pushing a chair in front of the sink turning on the water and transferring water and a BUNCH of dish washing liquid from cup to cup and then perching them on the edge of the counter where they inevitably fall to the floor creating a pool in the kitchen, when asked why he did it he shrugged his shoulders and said, "I was making lemonade,".
He tunes my husband and I completely out when he's watching t.v. and often times I have to do the whole "don't let me count to three" thing to get him moving a little faster. But there are some non-negotiables like I've mentioned before- you do not talk back or yell at your mother that is daddy's number one rule and failure to comply has ended up in spankings (probably 3 in four years) and punishment (no television all day, no toys and remanded to his room). So, again I recognize that I am dealing with a typical kid.
But make no mistake about it when we are out in public my son knows how to act. I'm sorry if there are doubters out there who don't believe it but it's true. Besides that is where I draw the line- I am not going to be embarrassed by a four year old who appears to have me on a string like a puppet- that's where my "old school" mentality comes out and trust me he knows when mama is serious. When I am away from him he knows that the adults that I have entrusted to take care of him are in charge. They have my unspoken permission to discipline him if he gets out of line.
Having said all this- whew- yesterday I was totally pissed off when an elder in my family "chastised" him without provocation. There was a birthday party/baby shower for a cousin and kids were in attendance although they were all in another room playing together. However my son, the mama's boy, was underfoot the entire time. He was not running, yelling, crying, disruptive, or anything else. He was just being my shadow. At one point I was taking a picture and I had the camera on a strap around my neck and when I let go of the camera it hit him in the head. He grabbed his head and said, "ow'. I picked him up and kissed the spot and said, "I'm sorry, I didn't see you," From ACROSS the room comes this comment: "That's because he needs to sit his ass down somewhere," And suddenly the room was quiet. My cousin knew I was about to spew some disrespectful vulgarities, so she immediately starting opening another present and oohing and aahing.
I on the other hand forced my child (who was convinced he had did something wrong) to sit as still as a statue until my cousin opened her last present and I bounced. I know that to some perhaps his presence was irritating being that he was the only child physically in the room the entire time but that comment was still- in my opinion- unwarranted. Or maybe, I'm acting like Ms. Bonita and not wanting anyone to say a word against my son?
I have to add before I sign off that had this been any other party/shower that was aimed at only adults or women there is NO WAY my son would have been there. I am not that mama who drags their children to every event invited or not. First of all, I was told it was okay if he came since my husband had to work, secondly it was a "CPT" affair that was set to start at 4:00pm and didn't officially get started until almost 6:00pm not to mention it was hotter than hades in the house. The entire affair was busted from the jump so to make it appear my son was disturbing the mood was just unfair.
This is Bonita Jenkins signing off. . .
Amen.
Kim Wayans used play a character on In Living Color named Ms. Bonita, the neighborhood gossip monger. She talked about everybody but when people started talking about her favorite person, Ms. Jenkins. She would get upset and start proclaiming, "Nobody bet not say nothing bad about Ms. Jenkins!" as if Ms. Jenkins was beyond reproach.
I use that point of reference as I start into a story from yesterday. First of all contrary to the way it may appear on this blog I do not proclaim to believe that my son is perfect. Not by any stretch of the imagination. He is four and he behaves like a four year old. He is past the age of throwing tantrums but he still does things that he has no business doing -like pushing a chair in front of the sink turning on the water and transferring water and a BUNCH of dish washing liquid from cup to cup and then perching them on the edge of the counter where they inevitably fall to the floor creating a pool in the kitchen, when asked why he did it he shrugged his shoulders and said, "I was making lemonade,".
He tunes my husband and I completely out when he's watching t.v. and often times I have to do the whole "don't let me count to three" thing to get him moving a little faster. But there are some non-negotiables like I've mentioned before- you do not talk back or yell at your mother that is daddy's number one rule and failure to comply has ended up in spankings (probably 3 in four years) and punishment (no television all day, no toys and remanded to his room). So, again I recognize that I am dealing with a typical kid.
But make no mistake about it when we are out in public my son knows how to act. I'm sorry if there are doubters out there who don't believe it but it's true. Besides that is where I draw the line- I am not going to be embarrassed by a four year old who appears to have me on a string like a puppet- that's where my "old school" mentality comes out and trust me he knows when mama is serious. When I am away from him he knows that the adults that I have entrusted to take care of him are in charge. They have my unspoken permission to discipline him if he gets out of line.
Having said all this- whew- yesterday I was totally pissed off when an elder in my family "chastised" him without provocation. There was a birthday party/baby shower for a cousin and kids were in attendance although they were all in another room playing together. However my son, the mama's boy, was underfoot the entire time. He was not running, yelling, crying, disruptive, or anything else. He was just being my shadow. At one point I was taking a picture and I had the camera on a strap around my neck and when I let go of the camera it hit him in the head. He grabbed his head and said, "ow'. I picked him up and kissed the spot and said, "I'm sorry, I didn't see you," From ACROSS the room comes this comment: "That's because he needs to sit his ass down somewhere," And suddenly the room was quiet. My cousin knew I was about to spew some disrespectful vulgarities, so she immediately starting opening another present and oohing and aahing.
I on the other hand forced my child (who was convinced he had did something wrong) to sit as still as a statue until my cousin opened her last present and I bounced. I know that to some perhaps his presence was irritating being that he was the only child physically in the room the entire time but that comment was still- in my opinion- unwarranted. Or maybe, I'm acting like Ms. Bonita and not wanting anyone to say a word against my son?
I have to add before I sign off that had this been any other party/shower that was aimed at only adults or women there is NO WAY my son would have been there. I am not that mama who drags their children to every event invited or not. First of all, I was told it was okay if he came since my husband had to work, secondly it was a "CPT" affair that was set to start at 4:00pm and didn't officially get started until almost 6:00pm not to mention it was hotter than hades in the house. The entire affair was busted from the jump so to make it appear my son was disturbing the mood was just unfair.
This is Bonita Jenkins signing off. . .
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment